Character Developmet... and just a little bit more of the story...

Hey Guys,

These days I have not been focusing on the character development like I should be.  For that I am sorry.
As the story has been neglected by me lately.   How do I bring you guys into something that is all in my head?  How do I form a story that would keep you involved.  I am not sure if I can. So, what I feel like doing today is  giving you another glimpse on the story.  Please, if you have critiques; give them to me.  However, I would like to focus on the idea the story is exciting, understood, and flow.  I would love to hear if you are wanting more.  As a writer it is important to me; know that I am making a story worth reading.

 

Cannon Beach, Oregon

“While the weather seems to have stabilized here on the West Coast, storms are raging all across the world.  In Italy there is now a death toll of one hundred fifty people. It seems small in comparison to Ireland where a near four hundred are trapped in the rubble and debris after a tsunami hit the Country’s coastal region last night.  Meteorologists are saying the freak storms are unpredictable and unreliable.  Officials of all countries are warning people to stay indoors and if you live on the coasts evacuate immediately.”

She turned off the TV as the reporter was moving on to more news.  “Well there are only two of us that can cause massive weather changes; you and Airianna...” she looked pointedly at the man that was behind her, “Where is Airianna now Father? I mean Your Highness…”

“Where she has been for the last sixteen years…”  His ice blue stare reached her green with a hint of anger, “in hiding with that traitor of a husband, course he wasn’t a traitor to us… I am sure his house is searching for them all the same.”  His rage subsided long enough to look in his oldest daughters eyes with some sort of longing, “Do you know where the child is?  I feel a power unlike any I have ever known… a power wild, raw, and mixed.”  He said the last word with disdain.

“No. The last I saw of the child it was being taken away by a nice family, with no magic running through their veins” she gave him a level green eyed stare.

“When Airianna left the child in your care did she leave t with anything explaining what it was? Or a name for it?”

“No father, nothing”

She felt his anger before it landed on her shoulders.  The pain ebbed on her cheek. “Find that half-breed child and bring it to me!  Otherwise you’ll be more like your mother than just in looks alone!”

“Yes father”, as she turned to walk away she almost refused to bow, then she turned and lowered her head ever so slightly.

“Katrina…”

“Yes Father?” she raised a red eyebrow.

“You will also find that blasphemous sister of yours and be rid of her.”

“And the husband?”

“Kill him. I will have no more unwanted heir half breeds in Fairy.”

“Yes Father.”

Katrina walked away as the windows shattered with the booming thunder.  “You’d think the ancient bastard would have a castle with the way he orders me around, or mistake me for a servant the way I do his bidding… but he lost his castle because of this…Fairy didn’t want him…”  She stopped the nearest servant, “I need a car, a ticket to Rome to leave tonight, and… have someone fix the windows that my father is so fond of breaking.”

“Yes Ma’am” the servant said and started to hurry off.

“Wait.”

“Yes ma’am?”

“Find something to calm the crazy old bastard.  Rain is fine but world wide catastrophes that kill hundreds is not…”

“Yes ma’am.”

She started down the main steps. “I’ve worked hard to keep that child from her fate.  Now I will have to kill her.  As much as I can’t stand my sister, her vial husband, and the spawn that they created, no one should die at the hands of that High King of Fairy...  not even them.”

 London, England

“Storms are raging all across the world and the death toll keeps rising.  When asked, meteorologists have no explanation.  According to some experts in America it could be Global warming finally making a full frontal appearance.  While people in Ireland claim it to be just a world wide massive coincidence.  Not unlike much of the world, London is getting its fare share of chaos with Earthquakes shaking Big Ben and having bridges move as if on a dance floor.  Officials are saying the Queen herself may even call for a “State of Emergency”, like America, Ireland, and China.  Italy has not yet declared it, but with such a death toll they are expected to soon…”

Her crystal blue eyes reached her husband pacing the flat.

“This just in… a hurricane is forming off the island of Capri in Italy… Meteorologist Monroe Sterling reports…”

“Thank you Marie.  The hurricane is reaching wind gusts of one hundred fifty miles an hour and climbing.  It looks that the eye of the storm is about seventy miles off the coast of the small island.  It doesn’t look to let up and as if it’s moving toward the island at an alarming rate.  Back to you Marie”

A pale hand turned the TV down but not off, “Landon…” her husky voice was soft.

“Do you know what this means?  He’s found her Airianna.  They’ve found her…”  his violet eyes glanced at but didn’t touch his wife’s blue.

“We don’t know that for sure.”  The voice found a bit of strength in the softness, “It could be her… You said yourself that she might possess power like mine or yours.”

“Or maybe not at all,” he reminded her.

“It could be her… I had strong powers at her age… but even at sixteen I didn’t have that kind of power.”

“But I did. Witches get their powers before a year old.  How are we to know she didn’t get hers then? We aren’t, because we wanted her safe… not dead.  It’s not her…”

“But Landon it could be…”

“Could be… but if it isn’t her… it’s him… or…” his voice trailed off.

“Or them…” she finished.

“All of them… if it’s your father and my whole family… We’ve condemned our daughter to die.”  His violet eyes glistened with tears.

She however showed no sign of emotion at all.

The Prophecy....

A friend of mine asked "in a good way" what at was going on with my story?

So I thought I would put up the very "The Prophecy" up for you all to read.

Hope you enjoy!

Please Note: this is the first draft... and it's probably filled with grammatical and punctuation errors.

"The Prophecy"

Along time ago, when royalty still meant something, and time would stand still with the slow passing of days; Vampires went bump in the night, Witches weren’t burned at the stake for being something they couldn’t control, myths and legends didn’t have to hide who they were, and Werewolves were the protectors of villages; there lived a family.

They were prosperous and had more wealth than many could dream of, they were healers and seers, with powers only to be told as otherworldly.  In the winter there was born a son. A child of untold beauty:  with blood red hair, purple eyes, and an olive complexion, he didn’t look of the human world.  At first, his father deemed him a changeling, and was to be thrown in the snow to die.  But soon after his birth his beautiful mother begged them not to; she had seen his destiny and it was tied to The Fates like no other could be.

“He is to be the reason; for the Worlds Collide”, she said… And every one listened, for when she spoke the truth came to be. 

I was small then… a mere puppy, but I understood her words… they made sense to me.  They thought me a dog, a companion for him, the child…they never guessed that we existed.  They with all their power didn’t believe in the magic of the earth; and so they spoke freely, ignorantly in front of me.  I remember her words clearly, for I had to hold them dearly, soon there was to be another wrapped in fates cruel hands the way that we were.

She spoke:  “There will come a day, long from now when this son of mine, will create a child.  That child will bring one world to its knees and another back to its former glory. That child will be of untold beauty, you will know it instantly as it will have coal black hair the color of the darkest night, with red streaks running through like the blood that will fall to the ground as people die. The eyes will be the bluest blue matching the ice the will come with the cold that will surely grow with each passing year that the child exists.  The child’s skin will be so white that it will look as the moon was brought down just to be with it. This child will bring death as it will bring life.  It will bring peace as it will bring danger to us all.  The child will bring the Worlds Collide. It is as The Fates command we shall not kill this boy; my son.  He is the to create something so wonderfully gifted and so powerful, that only the child’s mixed blood will save it from true death.  The child to be is immortal and cannot die.  Many will try, but none will succeed.”

With that she fell into a sleep so deep we thought her dead.  She woke up and remembered what she saw for it was unlike anything she had ever seen.  She watched the vision; the time passed and decades raced by as she witnessed a much older son, a much braver being than any of her people combined.  So she loved and protected her child. 

She waited for the day, that he would meet the woman that will bare the baby of her vision. The woman would have raven black hair, white skin, and ice blue eyes slightly larger than most.  His mother knew not what she was; just that this woman was not of the human world nor was she was not a Witch.  She was neither Vampire, nor Werewolf…. She just was.  The beautiful mother knew that the woman would come with her raven hair, and magic would follow her. So would the child that none but her son and that woman would want.

There comes a time when something must be let go.  Now was one of those times… a world was about to fade into the distant memories of women, children and men.   It was going to be no more… My world is fated to fade into the human one, just as the Vampires, and Werewolves, and soon even the Witches would fade and blend in.  Until the child of mixed blood is born, that blood will bring my world back to the former glory it once had… but with it, the child would break countless others apart.  Now the question was… “Where did my loyalty lie…” it lied with the child… that would soon come to be.

Raven... Or a section from "Bridgeman Mannor" as long promised

Hello Everyone!

It is with great pleasure that I tell you.... today I will be posting a part of a chapter of my Novel!

No, it's not more from the short stories of the characters I am writing... but it is a little peice to see if you all are paying attention! I would love plenty of feed back...

My sister is my reader normally, but, I would like more helpers.

So without further a do:

I opened my eyes to find I didn’t know where I was.  In fact I couldn’t even see where I was; everything was red; the sky the ground. I lifted my hands and saw the pale white was covered in the burgundy as well.  I blinked my eyes hoping it wasn’t real it was all a dream but everything looked amazingly tangible.  I took in a full breath and coughed the smell of metal out. The wind was blowing my black hair in my face, and I took comfort in the dark color. 

            I took in my little spot of ground and it too was covered in blood, what the hell was going on.  Tears started to stream down my cheeks, I felt confused and scared. No this was more than scared; I was terrified, even more than that I was starting to believe that I caused such a horrid scene.  But how? Only seconds ago I was in my room contemplating the choices ahead of me… wait… the choices ahead of me?   As I looked around the red fog was starting to fade, and I saw him; Jordan standing tall and strong and full of power. I remembered that he was in the room with me, and he was telling me something… what was he telling me?  I wanted to ask him, but then a fear pulled at my stomach and I stopped myself… What if I did this, what if I choose the wrong thing and it caused death. 

But who’s death?

What have I done? 

            I looked around again, this time to find Mally. When I found her, she crying but preparing herself for another attack.  I ran to her, it seemed like I was running up hill and against the wind.  It also felt as if I were running in water, when I looked down it wasn’t water; it was a stream of blood.  I didn’t know whether to scream or cry… I did a little of both.  Still I continued to run to Mally; it took forever to get to her. When I ran up to her, she pushed me aside to shield me from a deadly blow. 

            “Raven, you need to run to safety!” she was screaming over the roar of something.

            “Why?! What is this? What’s going on?” I couldn’t hear why she was screaming. I knew that there was a war going on around us but I couldn’t hear it.

            “Raven, it’s the World’s Collide now go!” she pushed me aside again, this time to the other direction…

            Just where the hell did she want me to go? Every where I looked there was blood, and death. By The Fates… did I do this? I started feel as if I had to know, Mally would know…

            “Did I do this?!”

            She didn’t answer me just kept fighting; in fact she refused to look at me.

            “Mally! DID I DO THIS?”

            “Yes, Raven, you did…” it was quiet, so quiet I barely heard her words.

            “Why? Why would I do this?” I didn’t have vindictive-dictating bone in my body.  This right now; that is going on, was evil.  No I wasn’t evil, angry, angst ridden, but not evil.  Was I?

            As I was looking around at all that was transpiring, it reminded me very much of a story I heard when I was a little girl, but for the life of me I couldn’t remember what it was.  How could I be thinking about children’s stories a time like this?  For some reason it seemed valid, it was a story about good and evil and the battle to save all of humanity; and a whole world. 

It started to rain, but it was warm; almost like the rain in Italy during the summer time. When I gazed up at the sky; what was raining down on me and everyone else made me gag.  It was blood.  I wanted to get out of the rain, away from the blood. I had no where to run. I started to hyperventilate, that’s when I remembered the childhood story. It was the “The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe” by CS Lewis.  The ultimate battle.  But that story was about God, and the Devil.  Something I wasn’t sure I believed in.  I wasn’t even sure I believed in The Fates.  If they existed, they like God had a lot of explaining to do.  I continued to freak out, I felt like I was going to faint at any moment.

I started to fall to the river of blood just as the world flashed around me, and I was hit by something fierce and full of magic.   The next thing I knew I was standing on the hill with Jordan and Mally looking down. 

            I looked at them and then the dead, did I even protect myself? Or did I tell them to die for my cause only to find there was no cause at all. 

How was this all my fault? I didn’t want to be a murderer; I just wanted peace for my kind and the human kind.

            “Raven, there will be no peace as long as you are full of turmoil inside. You have to set yourself free and trust The Fates” it was a voice I have never heard before, and it was in my head and very, very familiar. 

            I looked at Jordan, “Did you hear that?”

            “Raven I heard nothing, but the cries of the dead and the dying.” When he looked at me tears were streaming from his beautiful eyes.

Again the world shifted again and we were talking to what obviously was a very human person.  He was a messenger for their race, and he was scared. I could barely make out his words he was talking so softly.   It sounded as if he were saying that the humans were declaring war, and that the entire supernatural race was destined to be eradicated.  He was declaring that the humans were openly going to attempt a holocaust.

“Are you serious? Holocaust? Just because you don’t understand my kind?”

“I have no say Ms. Bridgeman, I am just the messenger.” He turned and walked away. When I followed him with my eyes I noticed we weren’t on the hill any longer but on the valley floor, with all the dead and dying.  In my head I heard the sorrow, and sadness. Everyone’s thoughts were pounding in my brain, and I knew that I was the bearer of all that had come to pass.  Jordan was heart broken and Mally was furious. I was in absolute shock.  I glanced at Jordan who had tears streaming down his face.  Then the world went black.

I woke up in my bed, alone.  I was covered in sweat and my eyes were swollen with tears. I flung myself up from my bed in a panting rage. I could not, would not do this. I will not be some prophecy child. I didn’t care, the dream I had was horrible it was so real.  Wait, I didn’t remember falling asleep. I was talking to Jordan.  Mid-sentence, I was in mid-sentence when I ended up where I was. 

I had a vision… that must have been it.

It was starting, all the changes that were to come, I could feel it.  I could not, would not bring Jordan through that.  He already went through this, he would understand if I didn’t want him around.  I stood and paced my room, but ended back where I started, on my bed sitting.

School... journal writing, and getting my computer back...

These last two weeks of school have been the most fun I have had in a long time. 
I spend hours reading and then doing the work... organized and stylish! HAHA... Jeremy on the other hand while doing well in school hates the work.  I guess opposites do attract! :)  My favorite part about school however, is not the writing or the reading... or even the ability to focus on one thing a time (Which is actually very hard for me), it's that I get to have two classes with my best friend in the whole word.  How could I not love that my husband and I share classes and are focusing our lives together? 

I have been studying some of the greatest writers in my Lit class... also, I am having to journal about them... LOVING it ! I get to write everyday! 


And I am so excited to say that I have my computer back at long last and i can really start writing Raven's story again!!!!! YAY!

Well that's all for now! Talk to you guys later!

Starting School...

As most of you don't know... I am an avid writing... (DUH)
However, what most of you didn't know is that I was starting schooool....
It started out that I thought I wanted to do communications.
I realized after starting school and taking and English Lit class, a critical reading class, and a writing class... that infact i DO NOT want to do communications as a major...

I want to write... always have, always will.

With that said I will not be discounting communications I will just not be focusing on it

Raven is going to have to go to the back burner for a little bit, so i can' focus on my studies..
If anyone actually reads this blog please note I will still be posting here as i get ideas about my story... but I will be creating a third blog called "Response Journal".  This Journal will be mostly my homework but, it will be fun for me and I hope you read it as well...

Thank you,
Jacque

Am I a Writer?

As a person of many words... and less in the action department, I find myself thinking: am I a writer? Do I actually have a good story?

Then after those thoughts... I come to a conclusion by doing what every human does; Rationalization.

I can rationalize why i hate getting up in the monring, i can rationalize why i didn't do the dishes for three days... i can even rationalize my tremendious fear of clowns.

You may ask clowns? Really?
Well, yes really.  Here's my excuse for running from them like a bat out of hell... nearly in tears everytime. (and yes that includes if they are on the tv)
They are child molesting murders.  There i said it... that's my belief and has been... even before like an idiot i read "it" AND saw the movie.... both just solidified the fear.  No, i have no real reason behind it... no, i will never go out of my way to figure it out. And, no my children will NEVER have a clown at their birthday parties... EVER.

See that? I rationalized my unexplained fear... and should i note that i am one of millions with this irrational fear? Honestly, i could make the funniest book just about that fear alone, complete with amusing true stories behind every excuse i have to fear them.

Why did i mention rationalization? Because, every human does it. I don't think that they realize how often or what over... but a person can rationalize the hell out of anything.  But, a writer not only rationalizes but creates a story behind what they have thought to be a good reason for their actions.  Thus you get the novel writing process.  because, without us watching, and making excuses that we know will not help... we create a conflit, and with that confilct we create the hero and heroine... in my case the Heroine is the true saviour...
Did this story come from some excuse i made? Yes, to tell the truth... Raven came to me one day after i was trying to tell my step mom why i wouldn't read anything that had to do with real life.  I was trying to rationalize my need to be taken away from this place called reality.  And, raven just did it for me.  She, was my muse.  Built off of years upon years.. of me reading stories about a boy and his dog, of stories where the girl needs to be saved by a big strong burly man... years upon years of feminine oppression.   Not only that but in reality! After, watching the only female presidential nominee fail to become the TRUE nominee i finally said you know what? I am going to write about Rave... she has been in my head for years... and she can save the world and prove that women have the power and we don't need a boy.


The other part of my conclusion is this: Writers watch.  Seriously, they watch... all the time.  Have you ever wondered why that guy/girl over in the corner at the coffee shop was watching the door and the room around them?  Maybe, just maybe they are writers.  Everything in this world can and will be used in whatever it is they are writing.

I know i do it... watch people.  I have gotten the dirtiest looks, i have even gotten rude comments.  And, and i have used everything in short stories i have written.  and when i say everything.. i truly mean everything.  Want to know something funny? My name means Litterally "The Watching Sea of Bitterness"...

Who do i write for: you the people... why? because the story is me... it's in me... part of me and because of me. It's my world... and i am creating it for you.

One more thing: I question everything... even myself. Without question there is not an answer... and without an answer there are not words.

So with that said... yes, i think i am a writer. 


I urge all writers out there to do what i have done.  Figure out what makes you write... and why you write... and then ask yourself "am i a writer?"  and i bet you will find your answer.